Letting go of worry, finding happiness

I was always worried about my alcoholic boyfriend—his health, his finances, even the mess left over the next day from empty beer cans. I felt that it was my fault. I was the cause of his stress.

I was driving myself crazy over the things he would do. It was a struggle to try to get him to stop drinking. It seems like there was never an end to all the turmoil that was going on around me.

One day, I was so upset I went to a mental health center for help. They mentioned Al-Anon. Of course, I thought that it was a program that would help me fix the alcoholic.

When I got to a meeting, I realized how wrong I was. Yet there was something about this program that helped put my mind at peace. So I kept coming back.

One slogan that grabbed my attention was “Let Go and Let God.” At first, I thought it meant to stop caring about the alcoholic. Later I realized it meant to let go of the problems that I can’t control and put them in the hands of God.

Every night I prayed that God would take care of his doings, and I would take care of mine. After a while, things started to get better. I found that it was easier to worry about what I was doing instead of worrying about what others were doing.

When people would ask, “Shouldn’t you worry about what the alcoholic is doing?” I’d reply, “I don’t have time for that, I only have time to work on me.” I found that my mind was at peace and that nothing else bothered me. I truly felt happy, the way I was before all the worrying began.

By Anonymous, Canada
The Forum, December 2009

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